Man sued Satan for depriving him of his civil rights
Hell to pay

A prisoner filed a lawsuit against Satan and his staff in United States District Court. It was dismissed on procedural grounds.

Gerald Mayo, a 22 year old inmate at Western Penitentiary in Pittsburgh, filed a claim before the United States District Court for deprivation of his civil rights under federal law.

He claimed that:

“Satan has on numerous occasions caused plaintiff misery and unwarranted threats, against the will of plaintiff, that Satan has placed deliberate obstacles in his path and has caused plaintiff’s downfall” and had therefore “deprived him of his constitutional rights.”

Hell to pay

The judge gave a nod to the devil’s only known appearance in an American court: Stephen Vincent Benet’s short story ‘The Devil and Daniel Webster’ where Webster contended the Prince of Darkness was a foreign prince and could not sue in America courts.

However, Judge Weber dismissed the case before him.

The grounds were that Mayo had failed to show that the devil lives within the court’s jurisdiction and federal marshals were not told how Satan could be summoned.

One wag in the Yale Law review suggested that Mr. Mayo was unable to find counsel because asking a lawyer to sue the devil would constitute an “obvious conflict of interest.”

It’s a shame. As we know, the devil is always ready to cut a deal, particularly with lawyers.

Just think of the class action possibilities if Satan lost…

Leave a Reply