So if Pope Francis were to star in a hit television show….

So, people on Reddit were faced with the title “..Pope Francis was a nightclub bouncer before he was Pope”. They couldn’t help but notice that it sounded like the Pope was a bouncer WHILE he was a cardinal. They smelled a hit tv show.

And ran with it like a popemobile on rails…

The name of the Pope Francis show ?

Cardinal Rules.

The Hardinal.

Guarding heaven’s door.

[Br]eaking [Bi]ible.

[B]reaking [B]read.

Battle Pope, from the guy who gave us The Walking Dead and Invincible.

Pontifexcellent.

This TV show needs a catchy slogan

He bows to no one, except his Lord and Savior… But in the meantime he’s bashing heads and taking sacraments,[comedic record scratch] and he’s all done taking sacraments… [Dont Stop Me Now by Queen plays as His Holiness beats the shit out of a non-denominational biker gang of some description]

“The devil is amongst us… stay back boy. This calls for diviine INTERVENTION!”

Kicking asses and taking confessions.

“I kick arse for the lord!”

My own suggestion was “Immaculate this, bitch” or “Infallible is as infallible does”

I just feel like this could run and run. The Holy See has 1,600 years and going, after all.

Got any other TV gold suggestions?

The full Reddit thread is here. Don’t eat while you read, because it WILL come out your nose.

Siobhan O’Shea is a freelance writer. She writes about pretty much everything but especially likes to bring readers’ attention to new tech, marketing, human behavior, and other oddities.